092413 JackKate

[05:47] -- abyssalArrow [AA] began pestering gaslampTragedian [GT] at 17:47 --

[05:47] AA: Hi.

[05:50] GT: Good evening.

[05:52] AA: What are you doing?

[05:53] GT: At the moment? Fixing my printer...damn dots are all out of line. I'm covered in toner ribbon and the stench of failure.

[05:54] AA: What does it smell like?

[05:55] GT: It smells a lot like french fry grease and pachouli oil.

[05:56] GT: Kind of makes one wish to vomit, yet makes one hungry. And even thinking of food makes one nauseous again. Its amazing.

[05:57] AA: Tantalizing. Certain chemicals do arouse a sense of adventure.

[05:58] GT: Speaking of which...how fairs my belladonna bellatrix this evening? Bad news perhaps?

[05:58] AA: I'm trying to combine a tarantula with a bluejay, it isn't working.

[05:59] AA: I do not know where to put the wings.

[06:02] GT: A trantajay? Hmm...have you tried placing them on the abdomin and reconfiguring the legs forward, almost like a feathered mosquito?

[06:03] GT: So the thorax and head flex downward a bit, eager to end the life of its prey bellow, greedy arms looking for purchase upoon the young hero's neck....

[06:04] AA: Perhaps. I'll try rearranging the legs to the front and rear, put the wings on the thorax, and swap the heads.

[06:05] AA: If only I could replace the beak with fangs.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:05] GT: But how will you fit the 8 eyes on the jay head...it isn't a proper monster without the eyes of eight.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:05] AA: That kind of precision is extreme.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> ABRUPT  <span style="color:rgb(0,85,0);">COLOR CHANGE

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:06] AA: I could attempt it.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:06] GT: No no a beak is fine. Lots of glorious eye trauma potential with beaks.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:07] AA: Hmmm... I may scrap this attempt and replace it with a crowrantula.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:07] AA: Better pecking beaks,

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:07] GT: GLORIOUS!

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:08] GT: Its...so grotesque and perfect.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:09] GT: Don't let those philostines tell you otherwise. What you do is art..its borderline magic. It touches me like a creepy uncle at an eighth birthday party.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:10] AA: I appreciate the sentiment.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:10] AA: Perhaps when you die I can make something out of you.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:11] GT: Not sure if you're flirting with me or threatening my life.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:11] AA: Is there a difference?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:12] GT: Seems you've been spending more then a little time with spiders.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:13] AA: They're more difficult than the other animals, both to kill without damaging and take apart.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:14] AA: I'm getting better at it though.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:16] GT: Hmm how do you make bolts small enough?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:16] AA: You don't. You have to fire a net shot to catch it, then pick it up by the abdomen and stick needles into the underbelly.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:17] GT: Wouldn't a butterfly net be easier?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:18] AA: I can find them easier if I'm in the trees.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:21] GT: But...oh nevermind...you penned the enchiridian when it comes to hunting from all appearances.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:22] AA: I try.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:24] GT: Aren't your parents worried about you traipsing through the woods with a bow at all hours and filling their house with glorious fur?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:26] AA: Hmm. My mother is quite flabberghasted about it, but I have my own shed that I moved into.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:31] GT: What kind of woman is your mother...your relationship sounds shakey.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:34] AA: She and I have our differences.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:35] AA: Speaking of which, I think she is cooking some of the doe I caught yesterday.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:36] GT: How...disgustingly domestic. I was rather sure your mother was some manner of lumberjack with a majestic beard and mighty ax roughing it alone in the woods with her only daughter.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:36] GT: No offense to your sainted mother

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:37] AA: The problem is I haven't skinned it yet.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[06:37] AA: I must away for a few minutes.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:02] AA: I return.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:09] GT: Hands covered in blood, elektra's gleem in thine eyes and a harsh maddened cackle profaning maiden lips?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:09] AA: Is that some form of prose?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:10] GT: No, some form of question

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:10] AA: Can you rephrase the question?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:11] GT: Have you returned with your hands covered in blood, with a look of matricidal rage in your eyes and a crazy laugh?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:12] AA: Unfortunately no.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:13] GT: Ah perhaps another day then

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:15] GT: I have attempted to orchestrate the demise of my guardian multiple times.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:15] GT: Alas, he is made of sterner stuff then I

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:16] AA: Mine keeps well enough away, most of the time.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:16] AA: Or perhaps it is I who keeps away.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:17] GT: Semantics!

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:18] GT: Equivocation!

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:18] AA: Perhaps

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:19] AA: Rest assured, if I wanted her dead, she would be.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:20] GT: You sound confident of your chances against the mighty lumberjack matron

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:20] AA: I wouldn't call her... mighty...

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:20] GT: What would you call her?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:23] AA: Worthy.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:26] GT: Worthy of praise?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:26] GT: Worthy of distain?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:26] AA: Both. She is both a Worthy Adversary and a Worthy Caretaker.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:28] GT: I see. Archibald is just...annoying

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:30] GT: But I digress. How was your repast?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:34] AA: The doe is ruined, but that is fine.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:34] AA: I have twelve more in my dungeon.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:35] GT: Dungeon?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:35] AA: My Freezer Dungeon.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:37] AA: Used for keeping all of my kills cold.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:40] GT: I see...I am struck by all consuming envy

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:41] AA: Do you have some use for my dungeon?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:43] GT: Its a fungeon! There are a mind bungling number of uses

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:43] AA: I assure you, it is quite cold. Colder than my room.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:44] GT: The deepest pits of tarterus may be colder then your palace of furs.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:48] GT: And sadly my space here is very limited...I am not granted much freedom of movement by sir clanksalot.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:49] AA: Why is that?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:52] GT: Ask whoever built the bastard.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:52] AA: You did not?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:52] GT: Heavens no

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:58] AA: How did he find you.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:58] GT: Speak of the devil

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:59] GT: I must take my leave

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:59] AA: Oh dear.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:59] AA: Good Luck.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:59] -- gaslampTragedian [GT] ceased pestering abyssalArrow [AA] at 19:59 --

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;">[07:59] <span style="color:rgb(100,100,100);">-- gaslampTragedian <span style="color:rgb(140,70,0);">[GT] <span style="color:rgb(100,100,100);"> changed their mood to OFFLINE --