030915tethysvyllen

 [06:46] GC: Vyll3n knocks and th3n promptly 3nt3rs h3r room.

 [06:47] GC: "Yo t3th3th3th3s."

 [06:47] GA: | "Come- Oh. What was the point of knocking if you were just going to come in immediately anyway?" |

 [06:47] GA: | "And hello." She's playing canasta with herself in bed. |

 [06:48] GC: H3 shrugs, "I dunno. Why ar3 you playing canasta? What is a canasta in th3 first plac3?"

 [06:49] GA: | "It's a card game wherein you're trying to make groups of similar cards called 'melds' to rack up the points and defeat the other team." |

 [06:50] GC: "R3ally now. So it's lik3 wh3n you stack up a bunch of 3n3rgi3s and th3n just d3molish your oppon3nt in TCGs?"

 [06:51] GA: | "...Maybe? I have no idea what you just said." |

 [06:52] GC: H3 shrugs again, "Eh. So what's up. W3 hav3n't spok3n in !"

 [06:53] GA: | "I'm pretty sure we spoke the other day on our adventure when you were giving me shit after I had just figured out the plot and broke my back." She crosses her arms. |

 [06:53] GC: "W3ll... Y3ah. W3'r3 w3 not sassing 3achoth3r in a fri3ndly, sassy mann3r?"

 [06:54] GA: | "It's not always appropriate." |

 [06:55] GC: "W3ll uh... Sorry? What 3xactly was 'th3 plot'?"

 [06:55] GA: | "That Mari or I could become the hero of that land and fix everything by going into the snake on purpose." |

 [06:56] GC: "W3ll that could b3 obs3rv3d. I m3ant what would you fixing 3v3rything 3ntail?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [06:57] GA: | "Using a big sword to cut things, or something else with it. Defeating the Witch of What Was?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [06:58] GC: "Sounds lik3 clich3 Knight ti3r things. 0/10 would not f3tch qu3st."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [06:58] GA: | "Actually, it sounded really important." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [06:59] GC: "But... Mari did it so... I gu3ss it's all good? Mayb3?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:01] GA: | "Pff, I dunno." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:01] GC: "I don't think I could go on som3 important World Qu3st. I'd just g3t... bor3d? And find som3thing 3ls3 to do."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:01] GA: | "You... What? This is our lives now. You could die if you did that!" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:02] GC: "I know."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:04] GA: | "But..." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:06] GC: "I'm not going to suicid3 or som3thing, though. I just know I'm going to scr3w up sp3ctacularly."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:06] GC: "And it's b3st to jsut brac3 mys3lf 3arly? rofl."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:07] GA: | "Well, obviously you won't succeed if you believe you'll fail right out of the gate." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:07] GC: "Kind of lik3 th3 gat3 thing from N3v3r Ending Story?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:08] GA: | "Never what?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:11] GC: "Y...You hav3n't s33n 'In which a human boy 3scap3s rud3 alpha childr3n and s3ts up camp in th3 attic of his school? H3 th3n finds a book and via his wild imagination vividly pictur3s it's charact3rs and sc3n3s. Th3 books main protaganist go3s through many trials and 3v3ntually r3ach3s his ultimat3 goal of stopping th3 void-lik3 3ntity that 3xists within th3 human natur3. And th3n lat3r, th3 mysti

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:11] GC: cal hair dragon trav3ls through spac3 and tim3 to m33t th3 boy and th3y chas3 th3 rud3 alpha mal3s through th3 busy str33ts of Human N3w York and th3n th3 cr3dits roll'? It's a r3ally good movi3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:12] GA: | "Oh. Yeah, T've heard of it, why didn't you just say the title?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:13] GC: "It's fast3r."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:15] GA: | "So... Did you... Have a reason for seeking me out...?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:17] GC: "Ar3 w3 not fri3nds? I b3li3v3 sp3aking just for th3 sak3 of doing it is a thing fri3nds do. Enjoy 3achoth3rs company or som3thing. But I wouldn't know, cl3arly."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:18] GA: | "Oh. Well, it's just that generally when people come by they have some information on some crazy happenings." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:18] GA: | "Small talk kind of died with Twotrees." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:19] GC: "Thos3 typ3s of things only happ3n wh3n a group of p3opl3 ar3 stuck following a s3t... Look, what3v3r. I gu3ss I could t3ll you about my illicit loot I got for watching som3on3 di3.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:19] GC: "

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:19] GA: | "...What?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:20] GC: "That som3on3 was Fat3. W3 watch3d h3r di3. And th3n w3 dug h3r grav3 and fossiliz3d h3r. But Thiago kiss3d h3r h3ad so... It's fin3. F33l kind of bad about l3aving h3r on3 lif3 short. But... th3r3 was nothing I could hav3 don3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:22] GA: | http://i.imgur.com/CaWR6Wq.png |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:22] GC: "Don't giv3 m3 that fucking look. Hav3 you SEEN Jack?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:23] GA: | "Yes?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:23] GC: "I m3an in action. Dud3 is scary."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:24] GC: "I would v3ry much lik3 to avoid g3tting on his bad sid3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:25] GA: | "Yes, but uh, my trouble is literally being a coward and I still stuck by my friends." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:26] GC: "Our asp3cts don't d3fin3 us, T3thys. Okay th3y do. But... Its diff3r3nt."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:29] GC: "I'm a hug3 fucking n3rd. AV Club Pr3sid3nt 3v3n. Jack is lik3 th3 big m3an jock dud3 that scar3s 3v3ryon3. (Ironically.) And in ord3r to not g3t 'b3at3n up' I'm PROBABLY going to hav3 to do his hom3work. In... you know, th3 m3taphorical s3ns3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:30] GA: | "...Wait, you're going to give him a blowjob? Also, what's an AV club?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:31] GC: "I..."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:31] GC: "W... What?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:32] GA: | "Do his homewo... Oh, you meant a different metaphor." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:32] GC: "Dammit T3thys." H3... smil3s?

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:34] GC: "And to answ3r your oth3r qu3stion, an AV Club is wh3r3 a bunch of fucking dorks do dorkish things with comput3rs and th3 lik3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:36] GA: | She nods. "Sounds pretty nerdy, yeah. What do you do on the computers?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:37] GC: "Just... work with th3m. You know, stupid things."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:38] GC: "Only I'm such a dw33abo I can sp3ak to comput3rs."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:39] GA: | "Wait, computers are sentient?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:39] GC: "Y3s. All that porn you brows3, th3y judg3 you."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:39] GC: "I think I can h3ar your phon3 now. Kinky T3thys, kinky."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:40] GA: | "What? Why would I browse the internet for porn?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:40] GC: "Uh-huh. Y3ah totally."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:41] GA: | "I mean, even before I had a matesprit or kismesis, I always got plenty of action. Lots of people come into the palace all the time." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:41] GA: | "Though I guess all of those people are dead now. Hm." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:42] GC: "Hot."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:42] GA: | "Ugh, inapprops! They're dead!" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:43] GC: "And w3r3 going to anyways! I'm pr3tty sur3 3v3ryon3 who isn't us h3r3 on th3 bas3 was doom3d to di3 from th3 b3ginning."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:46] GA: | "Well, probably." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:51] GC: "But what if th3y didn't all di3? Som3wh3r3, a group of los3rs ar3 car3fully surviving th3 apocalyps3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:53] GA: | Tethys closes her eyes in thought. "Hmm... And there are zombies too." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:53] GA: | "It was definitely nuclear weapons. That's what did it. And the explosions caused massive power outages, which caused the fail-safes to fail. Which released the super bacteria from a secret lab." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:54] GA: | "That caused a huge plague, and after the victims died, they rose from the dead twelve hours later to roam the worlds to feast on human and troll flesh." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:54] GA: | "Boom. Zombies." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:55] GC: "That sounds a whol3 lot cool3r than a bunch of kids b3com3 magical and th3ir bullshit tim3 par3nts com3 in b3caus3 th3y fuck3d up in th3ir s3ssion.

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:55] GC: "

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:55] GA: | "Then, our handful of gritty survivors from all walks of life were able to keep the legions of the infected radioactive undead at bay using only their wits and an inexplicable comprehension of agricultural science and engineering. Everything was looking good, and that's when the next meteor hit." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:55] GC: "And that's wh3r3 th3 shark is jump3d and it's all downhill from th3r3?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:55] GA: | "Probably." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:56] GC: "What a nic3 s3ri3s."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:56] GA: | "Actually, I was quoting Red vs Blue. I thought you were supposed to be a nerd?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:57] GA: | "Though I'm more like Washington than Grif. Ooh, or Tex. I'm totally tex." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:57] GA: | "You can be Simmons." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:57] GC: "I hav3 to draw a lin3 som3wh3r3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:58] GA: | "You gotta look inside yourself and say, 'What am I willing to put up with today?'" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:58] GC: "And why th3 h3ll do you know about R3d vs Blu3. Don't you hav3 a fucking job as a body guard or som3 shit?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [07:59] GA: | "Y-yes. I completely do." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:00] GC: "Was that a stutt3r?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:00] GA: | "I completely have a life outside of being a bodyguard!" Tethys is turning blue. |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:01] GA: | "I can do lots of important things other than bodyguarding." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:01] GC: Vyll3n giggl3s, "What's up with your fac3?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:02] GA: | She just gets bluer. "Nothing!!" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:02] GC: "You'r3 br3athing right now, right? Don't suffocat3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:03] GA: | She turns to the wall, covering her face. "Shut up!" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:04] GC: "Lot's of p3opl3 hav3 hobbi3s! Okay, w3ll... what you do is mor3 lik3 a job. Okay it is a job. Wait ar3 you g3tting paid?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:05] GA: | "No, I'm not an official bodyguard yet." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:05] GA: | "Stuff came up." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:05] GA: | "It's probably not going to happen." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:06] GC: "Oh! I thought you w3r3. You s33m pr3tty qualifi3d!"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:06] GA: | She sounds like she's on the verge of tears. "Y-yeah, I really am!" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:07] GC: Vyll3n frowns, "Ar3 you okay? Did I say som3thing wrong?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:08] GA: | "N... Maybe?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:08] GC: "Th3n what?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:09] GA: | Tethys takes a deep breath and her face returns to normal hue. "WellIcantotallydothingsbesidesbodyguardingbecauseImighthavetoincaseI'mparalysednow." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:10] GC: "Oh. Uh. If it's about th3 whol3... l3gs thing, it'll b3 fin3! W3 hav3 all kinds of h3aling magicks, and... uh... You can... di3?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:10] GC: "S... Do you... want a hug?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:11] GA: | "No?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:11] GA: | "And... What? Die?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:11] GA: | "The hell?" |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:11] GC: "Y3ah. You still hav3 th3 oth3r you, right?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:11] GC: "W3 can just kill this you, bring you back to lif3 and sinc3 th3 oth3r you hasn't b33n damag3d it'll all b3 good?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:12] GA: | http://i.imgur.com/vESvpWA.png |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:12] GC: "God fucking dammit. I am trying to b3 kind, and caring and shit h3r3 T3thys. Stop that."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:13] GA: | "By telling me I could kill myself to solve my problems." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:14] GC: "Okay, I phras3d that horribly. But... Fuck. I'm trying I r3ally am. Having no ranks in 3mpathy is hard."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:15] GA: | She looks away. "It's all right, Vyllen." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:15] GA: | "I usually fudge this part up too." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:15] GC: "It cl3arly isn't! B3caus3 now you'r3 all piss3d and sad and shit."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:16] GA: | "Nah, I was already pissed and sad. And I probably will be for maybe a couple days, but I'll get over it." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:17] GC: "That's... good?"

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:18] GA: | "Affirmative." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:19] GA: | "...Want to play a few rounds?" She gestures towards the cards." |

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:19] GC: "Hahah. Sur3."

<p style="margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px;"> [08:21] GA: | She deals, and explains the rules as they go. |